Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Somebody Is Lying...

The next day, A Saturday Morning...I was driving to my office...My other office...Morris Investigations when I saw a couple of police cars....several police officers...C.S.I. personell and police photographers...

I saw the crime scene tape and the familiar scene of detectives with tumblers of coffee walking around...Not just any detectives....but my friends...

I saw my good friend, Lt. Sissy Van Buren overseeing the crime scene....and Forensic Investigator, Dr. Hazel Baylor and Detective Carlotta Rodriguez-Wallace kneeling down looking at the body of a young man...

I parked my car and walked over to where they were...

''Working on a Saturday morning Siss? I thought you guys would be at the mall or getting your hair done."I laughed...

"Yeah,well hopefully we will be doing all of that in another hour or so. It's Saturday..What are you doing out this early?" said Sissy...

''Ahhh..I got a case...Man thinks his wife is cheating on him...Nothing heavy...I think it's all in his imagination, but I decided to stop by my office and do a preliminary work up...What have you guys got there?" I asked..

Carlotta kissed me on the cheek...

"Hola Kevin...This man was reported missing a day ago by his Uncle...An ADA....Friend of my husband...We found him here in this alley this morning.. He wasn't robbed....His wallet is full of cash.. over one thousand dollars...and three credit cards...His name is Allen Wilson...according to his drivers license." said Carlotta..

"Judging by Body temperature and lividity...I'd  estimate he's been dead about 24 hours...Look at the level of decomp." said Hazel...

"No street cameras in this area....or ATM cameras either...So it's going to be hard to determine what happened here..."said Detective Tyriq Pile ,who had just walked up..."Hey Kev" he said.

"Hey Rico...Looks like the cause of death was blunt force trauma..."I said.

"That's correct...Very good Kevin..."said Hazel...I smiled..

Detective James Barlow walked up...

"Hey Kev....Lieutenant...I got one person who might have heard something...A woman who was across the street...She said her window was open ,because it was so hot and around 1:00 am she heard two men arguing...The one man sounded like he was saying,I know you were sent here to kill me...and the other man said -"You're off your nut.." Then she heard what sounded like punches being thrown and then that was it...She thought it was just a fist fight."
''She get a look at the two men?"asked Tyriq.

" was dark and she just thought it was two drunks fighting...She said one of the men had on a white suit jacket.....That's all she remembered seeing..." said Jimmy....

"We need more than that...Maybe we can scrub the traffic cams from the nearby streets and see if we get a car speeding off or something..."said Carlotta...

"I wish I could help you guys." said Kevin...."I got a boring old my wife is screwing another man case.."I said.

"Lucky you..." laughed Sissy...

I kissed Sissy on the cheek and smiled..

"Good Luck Siss, guys...If I hear anything, concerning your John Doe here...I'll give you a call.."I said as I got back in my car...

They all waved goodbye and I looked sadly as the young man's body was picked up, put in a body bag and put on a gurney and walked off..

I no one in particular...

What was wrong with people? Why did they do the things they did to each other...? I'm sure Sissy and her detectives and Hazel wondered the same thing from time to time...


I was in the basement headquarters of Morris Communications.  Clerow and Owen Todd met me there.....Sean Jackson was probably screwing his wife, Sheila's brains out at this moment...He wasn't present...But Peeping Tom, Lockpick Johnson and their five guys, the four ex-CIA operatives and the ex-KGB operative were present....

"Gentlemen...This is who we are looking at Frenchette James....The wife of comedian, Leroy James..
our new client."I said.

''She's a real looker Kev..."said Peeping Tom..

"I'm going to interview her...but I need her looked at....Tom..I need you and your guys to wire her condo for sound and video..."

''We got it..." he said.

"Also...put some GPS devices on her car so we can follow her..."I said, hating to do this to this woman ,who could be completely innocent of any crime..I didn't mind bugging criminals and their associates or crooked politicians...but I hated following people's spouses...whether they were cheating or not...but it was part of the job...

Sean Jackson wandered in...

"Hey guys..." he said..

I smiled..

"Nice you could join us...We are going to follow this woman.."I said showing him 3 photos of Frenchette James..

He smiled..

"I'd love to follow her...ANYWHERE..."he said.

Clerow, Owen Todd and Lockpick Johnson all laughed....

"This is her address...Her husband thinks she's cheating on him." I said.

"Doesn't the husband live with her?" asked Owen Todd..

"No..They're seperated for the moment...He's in a hotel room downtown..It's the comedian, Leroy James's wife."I said.

"Good Lookin woman like that with that crazy loon...I'd cheat on his ass too."laughed Owen Todd...

"He's makin money Owen..That dude became a sensation overnight....First Podcasts, then You Tube videos, then the next thing you know..He's on Late night with Jimmy Kimmel, The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon ,Conan O'Brien and touring all over the country..."said Clerow..

"Yeah..I caught him last night at Josie's..He is funny." I said.

"We''ll take care of it "said Peeping Tom...

"Cool...Now go enjoy this lovely day guys."I said as we all got up and left.

I was going to wait until Monday before I actually went to see her...It was Saturday...I didn't feel like working..

Monday morning...I went to visit Mrs. Frenchette James...the estranged wife of Comedian ,Leroy James..

I knocked on the door and rang the bell...There was no answer...I called the number.. Someone answered the phone....or at least attempted to....What I heard next made me blush a bit..

"Whose is it?"

"It's yours..."


It's yours....Ouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu it's yours...."

"Give it to me daddy...Give it to me..."

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lawddd..."

A bed was squeaking feverishly.....The headboard was slamming against the wall hard...


"Ouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu..ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmph!" came a groan...


''Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh goodness girl what are you doing to me?" came the voice.


Apparently Mrs. James and HER HUSBAND...Mr. James were making love...and had been for awhile..

I walked down the stairs and crossed the street and sat in my car...

My phone was still on and I could hear everything they said...

"Where did you learn what you did for me? The way you wiggled your hips?" asked Leroy...

"What?" she asked incredulously...

"You did that for some other man didn't you?  " he asked her..

"'re crazy..There is no other man but you..." she said..

"I don't believe you....Now..Now..Now you done done some things in that bed to me that I aint never had done to me before...WHERE DID YOU LEARN THOSE TRICKS..WHAT MAN DID YOU DO IT FOR FIRST?" he bellowed...

"Leroy you're crazy....I thought we was making up...and here you come with your crazy accusations.."she said.

"Crazy?? I don't think they crazy...I think you screwin another man...Tryin to get rid of me and get my money.."he said.


"Well that hitman you sent after me the other night...I beat his brains in..He won't kill nobody else...You wasted your money on him." said Leroy....

"Hit man?? Hitman??I didn't send any hit man after you...You've lost your mind ,GET THE HELL OUT!!  I AM GOING TO GET A DIVORCE..AND I DON'T WANT A PENNY..I JUST WANT TO BE AWAY FROM YOUR CRAZY ASS!" screamed Frenchette...

"I don't have to put up with this...I'm gettin out..." he said..

I sat in my car and watched as Leroy James stormed out of the condo he shared sometimes with his wife,Frenchette James..a good looking woman that anybody would be proud to have...

I seriously began to believe that this man was out of his mind...

He walked right by me muttering..

"Wigglin your hips all sexy and making me come so hard.....I know some other guy taught you them tricks...I know it..You cheatin ass ho..." he said and got in his car and went tearing off...

And what "Hitman was he talking about,who's brains he had beat out?

I decided to go talk to the man himself...


''So Mr. Kevin have you begun the investigation?" asked Leroy James as I sat with him in his apartment, drinking a tumbler of cold water...

"I have...I've got my men following her car and I have her condo bugged...we'll be able to see who comes and who goes and know how long they stay." I said.

"Good." he said..

"I know that you uh left there this morning." I said.

He smiled.

"You're very good..Look, we are seperated, but we uh still have needs....I have needs and she uh fulfills those needs quite well at times.." he said.

''So Why do you think she's cheating on you and trying to have you killed?" I asked.

"Look..We've been married six years...The first three were wonderful...but some point in the fourth year she would have her moods...moods that would change...She stopped talking to me...She started acting funny..suspicious...I could feel it..feel it in my bones that she was seeing another man...I knew it...You can just tell...I asked her several times if there was someone else.but she denied it...I didn't believe it...I could tell by the way she would dress up ,all sexy and everything to go out without me...And how, even when we did make love the way she did different things...things she'd never done before...I just knew it...And then...I got this letter in the mail...just the other day..." he said..

He showed me a letter that was unsigned that read-

"Your Time Is Almost Up Ace!"

 "This is unsigned and it looks like it was printed from a computer..."I said.

" was printed from hers...She's trying to have me hit....One of the guys trying to have me hit tried it Saturday Night...right after I performed at Josies..." he said.

"He did?" I asked.

"Yeah, tried to acost me in the alley way..but I got the drop on him, beat his brains out....He'll never try that again." he said.

I now believed that this man was in dire need of psychiatric attention...but since he was paying me..I decided to humor him as best I could.

''She and this guy want me dead..."he said.

"You have any idea who this guy is ...That she's seeing..."I asked.

"No...He's some big wig...some kind of lawyer I think..."he said.

"She watered down my coffee.. I drink lots of coffee..she watered it down and I drank it...I was ill all day...Another time I woke up...The gas was on and the fire was burning on the oven...No pots in sight...Then I was nearly hit by a car a week later...and now the night before..this guy tries to hit me...I'm telling you...I'm marked for death..." he said.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked..

"I want you to me....from her! and this guy." he said.
So I went back to his wife's Condo...This time she answered the door..

She was a very sexy woman...and was wearing a black sheer mini skirt that left very little to the imagination..

She smiled when she saw me...I could tell she was expecting someone else...but she smiled when she saw me..

''Hello."she said.

"Hello..I'm Kevin Morris." I said.

"Mmmm, helllloooooooo Mister Morris."she said seductively....

''I'm an uh associate of your husband..."I said.

"Leroy???....How long have you known my husband?" she asked..

''About 48 hours.."I said.

She poured us both a tumbler of ice cold lemonade...

''So you're a P.I. right?"she said.

"I am...He thinks somebody is out to kill him and as his wife...I thought you ought to know about it."I said.

"Cut the crap Kevin...While I still like you....He thinks I'm trying to kill him doesn't he?  He thinks I have a boyfriend too...He's paranoid and schizophrenic and I have been dealing with it for six years...SIX LONG TORTUROUS YEARS!  He's jealous, controlling, he takes offense or finds offense with everything you say or do and he sees a boogeyman , where there is none.. Why would I want to kill him? I'm not a mob boss..I'm his wife..And he's just starting to make a little money...It's not like he's Kevin Hart...or Steve Harvey or something...I work too...He's sick....He's very sick...I've suggested he see a therapist, talk to somebody...He's so talented..So sensitive and talented...but he's crazy....I love him..I swear I do...but I can't take much more of this...Now come on Kevin...Do I look like a killer to you?" she said seductively...

I smiled and then I showed her a letter, the threatening letter he said she wrote..

"Your Time Is Almost Up Ace!", it read.

Before I could say anything she smiled..

"That came from my computer....I can tell by the print...He wrote this damn letter himself...He's crazy...I've tried to get him to see a doctor...but he won't..We just wind up arguing....He was here this morning..We drank wine, we made was nice and then he ..he got mad over the silliest I wiggled my hips...I tell you no lie."she said.

I felt sorry that I had her place bugged and GPS trackers in and on her car....I believed her...I was going to observe her and follow her for a few days and then give Leroy his money back and suggest a therapist.

"You're married I see." she said.

"I am." I said.

"Any kids?" she asked..

''A girl, almost a year old.."I said.

"Your wife is a very lucky woman.."she said..

"Thank you...Thank you for your time.."I said and got up and left..

Sepia waited up for me that night when I got home...I told her about my day and about my conversation with both Mr. and Mrs. James...She sat on my lap as I scanned my computer monitor.

I scanned the area.. Scrubbing the Street Cams in the area of his wife's home...The block was quiet...I then streamed some cool jazz... Reed Nelson's new CD  ,from my Sattelite feed...
Sepia put her arms around me...and kissed my neck...

"You know what I think?" she said.

''What is that?" I asked.

"Somebody is Lying...One of those two is lying...Either you're right and he is as crazy as a loon or she's selling you a bill of goods." said Sepia..

"And the one who is telling the truth?" I asked as we sat at my new work station.


''Should watch their back..."she said.



Brenda said...

Sepia is right..One of these two people is lying and the other one better watch their back!