Until You Say You Love Me

ART: "My Girl" By Laurie Cooper

I'll keep a Light
in my window pane..
to help me keep a vigil
until you come again...
you've got something to say to me...
but I'll wait..
I'll wait patiently.../

/I've done everything
everything I can....
just to show you, how much I want to be your man..
I'm at the end of my rope baby
so I'll wait for you to say those magic words to me../

/I'll keep a light in my window pane
Until you say you love me..
I'll be right here...
until you say you need me..

/Like a Soldier,
Standing Tall
waiting for the night...
the night you say you'll fall...
hopelessly in love with me...
Like I've fallen in love with you../

/You've held out
as long as you could
you've been turned out
by guys that meant you no good..
you've got nowhere to go girl...
nowhere ,except to me../

/Mantendre' una luz encendida
en mi ventana....
Hasta que me digas que me amas
Estante' aqui hasta el dia
el dia que me diga que me amas.../

/I'll keep a light in my window
pane
Until you say you love me...
I'll be here on the day you say
The day you say you love me.../

/Hasta que me diga que me amas
Estare' aqui me digas que me amas.../

(That's spanish baby, I thought you'd find that romantic.")

Until you say you love me...
say it
say it
say it for me one time...
because I'll be right here
Until you say
Until you say you love me../

My Baby's Mother

ART: "My Woman II-Limited Edition" By Laurie Cooper

I tossed and turned...I couldn't sleep...so I found myself calling her...It was 1:50 am...My Name is Chess.

"Hello..."

"Hey...are you awake?"

"I am now....what you want Chess?"

"Can I come over?"

"What?"

"Can I come over?"

"Chess,it's almost two o'clock...don't you have to go to work? Ohhh, that's right, you mista
big baller now...You own your own businesses now..you get up when you wanna.."

"Rell, it's early Saturday Morning...it's not like you workin today."

"No, but I was asleep."

"Where's the baby?"

"He's over mom-mom's house."

"Whatttt...and it's Friday night and you in bed this early?"

"I had a date.......He........he canceled..."

"Sorry to hear that....so.........can I come see you?"

"Chess...it's been six months since we broke up...I don't think that's a good idea."

"Why not...I'm alone....and you're alone...."

"How you know if I'm alone?"

"It's 1:50 am early Saturday morning and you're in bed alone ,asleep and the baby aint there,
let's not bullshit each other...I know how you party..this aint you?"

"Oh so you think us gettin back together will solve that...I don't think so-"

"Rell,I didn't say nothing about us gettin back together...I asked you if I could come see you
tonight."

"Ohhhhhhhh..........hmmmmm...Chess...oh alright, but hurry up...I might fall asleep."

Click!


Rell's house was just a twenty minute drive from where I was now laying my head. It took me no time to shower and brush my teeth, throw on some cologne (not too much) Hop in my ride and jet over to her house.
When she opened the door, she was wearing one of my big white shirts, a white flowery lace bra
and black string bikini panties...She smelled like cocoa butter, she always did and that soft honey
brown skin of hers always seemed to glisten in the moon light. I grabbed her and began kissing
her and tongueing her down right in the doorway...At first she was matching me passionately and then she noticed that her door was wide open and that anybody looking out of their window
or walking by could see us...She pushed herself away from me....

"Chess, not in the front door...come inside..I don't want my neighbors all up in my business,
I just moved around here." she said. I grinned and followed her up the stairs, taking my shirt
off and removing my pants and shoes and socks.

"Oh my.......what ? has it been six months since you had some? " she taunted.... I just threw her
on the bed and mounted her..kissing her passionately....

"Ohh Chess, I've missed you sooo much" she said as she hungrilly kissed me.

I slowly guided her panties down and guided myself into her.....she began to moan softly....

"Chess, don't stop.....don't stop....oh push...push ...just go deeper....."

I obliged her....to my surprise, she was already wet and I plunged in deeper than I had before and we lie there making sweet love slowly for close to forty minutes or so.....and kissing each other hungrily...

I would never know and she would never tell, but I don't think Rell had seen anyone since she and I had broke off our engagement six months before..

"Ohhhhhhhhh Chess, keep goin....more...morrre...slower....slower....ohhhh....."

I began to move faster and harder, despite what she was saying and she began to scratch my
back.....

"Ouuuu...just like that...just like thattt....Oh Chess I-" she stopped short of what she was going
to say...She began shaking and her head leaned backward......at this point, I began shaking myself and I exploded and grunted.....just as she let out a loud moan......and we held each other
tighter than we had in months...

We were still holding each other in the morning when we woke up.. Rell moved away from me and lay facing the ceiling...

"Chess....I think you should go now." she said.

"Huh? It's only 7:30."

"I know, but mom-mom will be bringing the baby over here and I don't want her to see
you here." she said.

"What? You was plannin to have company last night...were you going to rush him out of here
this early in the morning ?" I asked...

"Chess please...don't make this hard....We shouldn't have even done what we did last night..
I mean, we aint together no more." she said.

I was pissed now...I got up scrambled to find my boxer shorts, my t shirt and my socks and then slowly I began putting on my pants, shirt and shoes...I didn't say a word...

"Wait Chess, you aint gotta leave like that...you can take a shower.." she said.

"That's quite alright...I can shower when I get home..." I said and headed down the stairs..

'Chess, don't be like that, let's not end a wonderful night like this." she said.

"Wonderful night? Hummph! You ended it like this....You can't have it both ways Rell...
I'm out...Have a nice life." I said.

I jumped in my car and drove off....I didn't look back to see if she was still standing in the doorway..I was too hurt...I was more hurt than angry and I don't know if she could tell that or not..I knew that I would never call her again and I knew that I had to move on...I knew this, but
I didn't feel it. I just didn't feel it.

Flipped

ART: "Yellow Hat" By Laurie Cooper

Just when I imagined, we'd hit our stride...
You flipped the script on me..
you blew my mind.../

I guess talk on the street has got to be true
you flipped the script on me..
you've gone and found someone new.../

Well I need to know
if I should stay or go...
but don't even try to play me or waste my time
by even suggesting that you could continue
to be a friend of mine../

Girl ,I really thought everything was going just fine...
You flipped the script on me...
you blew my mind.../

And if you knew all along that you were going to go
why couldn't I hear it from you?
why did I have to be the last to know?

I think I know what I need to know
that it's time to let you go..
and while you continue to play your game
I just want you to know that I'm not goin out that way.../

There is one thing I know to be true...
that one day someone will flip the script on you...
Then you'll see what it's like to be the talk of the town...
when you find out that what goes around, comes around.../

God Behind The Sun

ART: "Deliverance" By Laurie Cooper

I never meant to spend the rest of my days
living the life of a paltry wage slave...
And I don't mean to spend another uneventful
day..
workin like a dog for just the minimum wage..
I don't want to spend my time in a man made hell...
Feeling as though I'm trapped within a prison cell...
I can't see me ever playin the part..
of some statistic on an urban planning chart.../

/There's got to be a God Behind the Sun...
who shines his light on everyone..
There's got to be a God behind the Sun
to give me strength to get the battle
of the day won../

/Seems like they will never change this place..
Sometimes I wonder if the dealers will kill
the spirits of the entire human race..
and they would kill me for a vial of crack..
but I'm not even tryin to go out like that.../

/There's got to be a God
behind the sun...
who shines his warmth on everyone..
There's got to be a God
behind the sun..
who gives me hope to keep going on
until the day is done.../

/Work all day,
sometimes I don't sleep at night...
wake up to a new sunlight...
come home, feels like my head is caved in...
Feelin like something that the cat drug in.../

/There's got to be a God
behind the sun..
who shines his warmth on everyone..
Please let there be a God behind the sun..
who gives me strength to get the battle
of this life won../

Can't Buy Me Love

ART: "Neighborhood" By Jacob Lawrence

I was in the State Store buying two bottles of Sutter House Wine . I was in a celebratory mood..
As I was standing in line I overheard a conversation between a man and a woman standing in front of me...

"See dats your problem....you don't know a good man when you see him." said the well dressed
young guy who ,to me had on way too much jewelry...

" Good man? Who You? My last man, Sexy G. bought me a platinum watch and took me on a
shoppin spree...and he had a 2009 BMW...what you got? What you givin me but a headache wit
yo whinin." she said. She was an attractive brown skinned woman, with a pair of White Capri
pants on and a yellow sheer top. She had on a black underwire bra that you could see right
through the blouse.

As they prattled on ,I kept wondering why people equated money with love and love with money. As I walked out to my car, I heard the radio blasting from another car that stopped at
the corner.....

"aint nothin goin on but the rent.....you got ta have a j-o-b...if ya wanna be with me...
no romance ,without fi-nance...gotta have a j-o-b.. if ya wanna beeee wit me..."

I laughed out loud and got in my car and drove over to the loft where Rell, my son and I were
staying...We had held off getting married for a month now....because of all of the activities of the
summer..but with the summer waning, there was no reason to put it off.

Rell was looking fabulous as usual....She sat at the table and I filled two goblets with wine and gave one to her to make a toast....

"To Us baby.....To us." I said....but she didn't toast.....

"Hey,what's wrong with you?" I asked.

"I can't marry you Chess." she said.

"What?"

"Chess, youse a gangster...and I don't want to be part of that, I don't want our child around that."
she said.

"No...Nooooo...Noooo Luv, you got it all wrong...Chris Thompson aint got nothin to do with
my gym or my Apartments....Nothin...No legal claim, no money laundering , no hangin
out..nothin..and I'm strictly legit...You know I don't sling no drugs...nothin" I said.

That was for the most part true...I failed to mention that Chris gave me a peice of the now deceased, Indian Joe's high stakes Crap game and that I gave a peice of that to Chris...but that was the only part of Chris's business I was involved in. The lion share of my money was legal..
from those Apartments and the Gym..

"You think Chris just gon give you that Gym and that Apartment complex to manage and not want something back? You can't be that niave Chess...People like Chris Thompson don't just
give people things...not without wanting something back." she said.

"Rell, it aint like that...Chris and me been friends, since we could walk....He felt as though he owed me-" I said.

"Owed you for what? For what Chess?? Did it have to do with my brother dying?" She said.

"No, No, it had nothing to do with your brother at all.....Chris didn't have nothin to do with Billy Ray gettin shot...Billy Ray was somewhere he wasn't supposed to be and he got caught up in
something he had nothin to do with.." I tried to explain.

"Well Chess, I can't marry you...not now...Maybe......Maybe someday I'll feel different...maybe
I won't....but right now...right now, you and me? I don't think it would work." she said.

"This aint just about Chris is it?" I asked..

"No, it aint." she said.

"Rell, I got money, you and me, we could live the good life...You could only work if you wanted to.. All I do is collect my rent and my money from the Gym...After I pay my employees and my
bills...I still got more in my pockets than some people make in a month, hell in two months...I
could give you damn near anything you want....and our son...He aint never gon want for nothin.."
I said.

" That's nice and if I was a gold digger,I'd be all over you right now...but I'm not that kind of girl." she said....and she wasn't. She tried to hold back a tear...I got up to walk to her and she waved me off...

"I'm sorry Chess...I'm sorry...I can't talk to you right now....I gotta go." she said..and she got up
and walked out of the door and out of my life.

Seems like we were happier together when I had nothing....I didn't know if she was filled with so much (here to for unknown) grief for her dead brother....if everytime she saw me , I reminded her of what happened to him...I don't know...Maybe it was her fear of my friendship with a known gangster, Chris Thompson....or maybe it was something else altogether that I was missing.

I sat out on the front porch of my Apartment complex and looked down at the people walking
down the street ,at the cars going up and down the street...and I pondered my gift of steady money and my curse of losing the woman I loved...I thought about the money and I thought
about Rell. I'd give it all up for Rell.....well maybe....but not today!

The Gift & The Curse!

2009 Dodge Charger

Rell was devestated by Billy Ray's death, which I didn't understand because she never in the entire time that I knew her had anything good to say about him. In fact I honestly thought she was faking greif the entire week leading up to his funeral. Our relationship began to get somewhat frosty too.I mostly stayed away...Allowing her to grieve on her own.. On the day before the funeral...I was in the K&A Sandwich shop in South Philly, ordering an Italian Hoagie when Chris Thompson and two of his bodyguards walked in.

"Damn Chess, you get around brother man?" he laughed.

"Have to....Streets is talkin...or so I hear." I said.

"What you eatin?" He asked..

"An Italian and a Coke" I said...

Chris pulled out a wad of bills and told the cashier...

"His food is on me and could I have Three Turkey Hoagies, A Sprite and two cokes for my friends here?" He laughed at the young female cashier ,who was obviously impressed by his money and his swagger.He motioned to me to walk outside with him...and motioned for his two
bodyguards to stay put. We walked outside and he put his arm around me-

"Heard you was a stand up guy the other night at D-Rock's gym..wanna tell me what
you was doin there in the first place?" he asked.

"Not that I have to explain to you my whereabouts, but since it don't matter now..
I was there because Billy Ray was hidin out there..He's my baby's mama's brother." I said.

" Too bad..He was an asshole as well... I told Indian Joe that the Roc Boyz was down with
me and that we wanted to talk a truce. We were all supposed to meet in the Barbershop
at the Roc Boyz gym. That treacherous ass Indian Joe sends two hitters instead and does
me a tremendous favor...Takes out two of my hated rivals and a pain in the ass who I didn't e
even know was there...How lucky am I?" said Chris.

" But you and the Roc Boyz didn't have no truce....and you know that Indian Joe would only
want to hear one thing..That his money was coming back to him.. He aint the type to talk
no truce." I said.

"Chess...Chess... Who you talkin to? I'm the King of Philadelphia...I know that! I never
intended on any truce. I did that to wipe out those damn Roc Boyz...and to show all the
other playas that Indian Joe is not to be trusted. I didn't know your girl's brother or you
for that matter was gonna be there, honest to God Chess...I aint know...but I'm gonna make
it up to you." said Chris.

"Oh, you gonna make it up to me, how?" I asked.

"I'm glad you asked... My lawyer, Conrad is meeting me tonight at Josie's Bar..You know
where it is...I got some papers for you to sign." he said, no longer laughing and deadly
serious.

" Papers, what kind of papers?" I asked.

"You know that Gym that the Roc Boyz owned? Well, I bought it right after they died
from their, let's say" business manager" He initially didn't want to sell, but I made him
an offer he couldn't refuse...his life. Only thing is..I don't need a gym...I own enough fronts
,so I'm giving it to you....The Apartment buildings too...That's yours to do with as you
please, lock stock and barrell." said Chris.

"Hey man, I told you, I will not work for you..I don't want nothin to do with your business
Chris." I said.

"And you won't. The gym and the apartments are yours, after you sign the papers
at Josie's tonight...I won't have nothin to do with them. You have my word."he said.

"Soooo, no juice right...no laundering dirty money???" I asked...

"Not in your joints..I got that covered..I don't need the gym or the apartments....
they are yours...they're stone cold money makers bruh..You got a son, You about
to get married...I'm givin you a start at life...You won't have to work like a dog...
You'll own two lucrative businesses..." said Chris..

"So what's the catch?" I said.

"Friendship has no catches Chess..We been friends since we was kids...This is my
chance to do one good thing in my life...." he said somberly.

"One thing huh?" I laughed.

"Yeah......you can thank me later Chess, just be at Josie's to sign them papers." he
said.

Chris and I and his bodyguards went inside and enjoyed the Hoagies and sodas... I felt
great..Wait until I tell Rell about how good our lives was gonna be.. Chris looked like a
huge weight had been lifted off of his shoulders too as he sat and ate and joked with us
and flirted with the cashier...

In Germantown, I would find out later...Indian Joe and four of his top asistants stopped
to get gas at the Hess Station...They didn't notice the Black Charger that drove up
behind them...They were busy talking and didn't notice the two men that got out of the
charger...They had on Black shirts and Black slacks and Black Shoes...They attached
silencers to their pistols and fired three shots into Indian Joe and four of his men a peice.

Indian Joe and his his guys collapsed in a pool of blood right there at that gas station and
nobody heard or saw a thing!!! The two guys got back into the Charger and drove off
into the night just like that....

I wouldn't find this out until the next morning, after I had signed the papers and become
the owner of "Chess's gym" and the "Checkmate" Apartments and lofts. I knew that
Chris Thompson was responsible for Indian Joe's demise...and I knew that one day
Justice would catch up with my childhood friend...but tonight....this night..everything
seemed right with the world.

(Conclusion next..........)