By Any Other Name

"Ohhhhhhhhhhh, OHHHHHHHHH GODDDDDDED...OUUUUUUUU Roberttttttttttt,OHHHHHH BAbbyyyyyyyyyyy!"

"Awwwwww, come on now...ummmmmph, give it to me...ouuuuuuuuuuu..."

"Ohhhhhh darling, baby...ouuuuuuuu..."

''Keeeep it, right there...right thereee...ohhhhhhhhhh, I'm almost home baby...ohhhhh..."

"Ohhhh lover....ohhhhhhhhhhhh..."

"Ohhhh Ingrid....sock it to me baby...ohhhhhhhhh...."

"INGRID??? Who in the hell is Ingrid?"

"Oh...did I say Ingrid?? "

"Robert, get off of me..."

"Aww come on baby...you can't leave me like this...I was almost home..."

"Get off of me now."

I rolled off of Bonita...still rock hard and largely unfulfilled....I realized there was no need in trying to beg...The moment as they say was lost.....

"Look Bonita...we are just friends....We aren't a couple...remember we talked about this? We are loose...you know ,wild and free?? You know I see other people...don't you see other guys??Why are you getting like this?" I said ,trying one last ditch effort .

"Robert, put your clothes on and go home...I need to think." said Bonita.

"Think? About what? It's 3;30 in the mornin...You want me to drive across that bridge to Philly?" I said.

"I don't care what you do...call Ingrid..I'm sure she can pick you up." said Bonita non-chalantly.

"Well can I shower at least?" I said.

"Why? You want to be clean for Ingrid?" asked Bonita.

I said nothing, I got out of bed, put on my clothes, grabbed my car keys and went to my car. It was a long ride back to Philly...I turned on the radio...Teddy Pendergrass was singing -"The whole town's laughing at you...silly fool, how'd you lose...such a good thing..." I turned the radio off..I couldn't believe that I had made a mistake like that...Two marriages and several ladies in between and since and I had never called a woman by another woman's name....Until now.

I drove around town.....Josies was closed....I could have sure used a good dressing down from Gus, but by now he was home and I sure wasn't going to go by his house...A dressing down was one thing..a blast from his shotgun was another! I drove by the Courtland Apartments...Maybe my good friend,Deborah was up....She was a hot number...I had had my eyes on both her and her sister at one time...but the Trumpet player, Reed Nelson snatched her up....She lived in the first floor apartment...Once I walked by her window, I changed my mind about knocking on her door....Apparently, Reed Nelson was back from his tour.....

The bed was squeaking something furiously and I could hear Debbie screaming with passion...

"OHHHHHHHHHHHH, OHHHHHHH LAWDDDDD...OUUUUUUUUUU baby, do it...do..it.. do it to mama goooooooood..ouuuuuuuuuuu..."

"Ohhhhhh baby...whose is it?, whose is ittttttttt...ohhhhhhhhh..."

"It's yours daddy..ohhhh, it's all yours.....oh Ralph, give it to me, give it to meeeee...give it to mama..ohhhhhhh baby..."

"RALPH??, RALPH? Who the hell is RALPH?" said an angry Reed....

"I didn't say Ralph...I coughed...that's what you heard baby." said Debbie.

"You sure? I could have sworn you said Ralph." said Reed.

"As good as this lovin is you puttin on me...how could I think of another man? Now come on over here and give mama some more of that good lovin daddy..." said Debbie...

"Okay...I just thought you said another man's name." said Reed..

"Perish the thought lover, you're the only man for me....and I've been a good girl all these weeks waiting for you while you been on the road..Have you been a good boy?" cooed Debbie.

"I sure have.." said Reed...

"Good ,now come on over here and get your reward." she cooed.

"Well Alrighttttt." said Reed.

I just smiled and walked away...I got in my car and drove to my lonely and now empty apartment.. I put on Miles Davis, Kind of Blue and I plopped down on my couch...Ingrid Rhodes, the singer I had been seeing for awhile was on the road with her band...So no kind of action for me tonight...Debbie sure was smart...I can't believe that Reed Nelson let her get away with that lame excuse...but then again...yes I could..I mean , you had to look at Debbie...She coulda called out every name in the phone book at a time like that and I wouldn't have cared....But see, men, we are different...Women don't think like us.

I laid down and drifted off to sleep....I guess I had been asleep for an hour when my doorbell rang. It was about 5:30 in the morning...a Sunday morning at that...Who could it be? I opened the door...It was Bonita!

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I got to thinking about what you said...We aren't a couple, per se.....and even though I haven't as of yet dated anybody else but you in a long while, I have no right to act like that because you occassionally do....I mean you have been open with me." she said.

I stood there for a minute....I know she was perplexed...

"Aren't you going to let me in?" she said.

"Yeah, sure...come on in." I said. I went to plop down on the couch, but she pulled me to her and gave me a kiss..it was long and soft...

"I didn't drive all the way here to sit on the couch and listen to music ." she said.

Hello! The night or should I say early morning still had some promise after all!

"Oh Heather!" I said...

"Heather???" said Bonita...

"I'm joking...I'm joking." I said as we walked upstairs , towards my bedroom! My name is Robert Foxworth...and most of the time, I'm a pretty good Attorney.