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Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Rum Tum Tummy

Carlotta and I and six police cars drove up to the ''Frostbite Apartments" in the East Fall Section of Philadelphia....and once inside...


We found the body of 39 year old Johnny Lee Taney, A construction contractor... He had been shot twice in the back of the head with a gun that probably had a silencer on it...since nobody in the neighborhood saw or heard a thing...and was found in the bath tub...just like the other victims...


As the body was being pulled out...Carlotta looked in the living room area and sure enough....There was another shot glass....




She sniffed it....

"Hmmm, it's Puerto-Rican rum.....the good stuff...This isn't cheap...you're not going to find this ,just any ole where." she said.  she bagged it and tagged it...

"This will go with my other one...."

"Looks like our killer or killers has a drinking problem." I said.

"At first I thought this was a slip up...But now...I'm convinced....We were meant to find this...." she said.

"The caller said that Friday' child works hard for a living...." I said.

"Don't construction workers work hard?  Even if he is just a contractor." she said.

"Yeah I guess you're right....but now take Tyriq Pile's victim...The Jockey...His caller said Wednesday's child is full of woe...You think this guy had piled up debts with somebody?" I asked.

"Keith...He was a jockey!! What does a jockey say to stop his horse??  Whoaaaaaaa." she said and smiled..

''Damn...you're right....You know, your intellect is turning me on right now ." I said...

"You sure it's that? I thought me sitting on your sofa in my panties, eating that banana was what would do it." she said and laughed...

"We gotta stop talkin like this...I can't concentrate on the case at hand." I said.

Carlotta busted out laughing....

II-


We all, Detective Barlow, Detective Pile, Detective Carlotta Rodriguez and several other investigators and uniformed policemen met in Lt. Sissy Van Buren's office later on in the morning...We still hadn't given the newspapers anything...No connection and no mention of the rhymes or the shot glasses..nothing..Officially we were treating these cases as seperate....


Sissy frightened me the way she could metamorphisize....Last night she had been depressed and near drunk when I saw her....Today, she was fully sober and very professional...Very much the Lieutenant of Homicide,
Major Crimes and Special Victims Units...

"Okay guys...what do we know?" she asked.

"All of us got a call...A husky voiced woman , who recited the old rhyme..." said Detective Barlow.


"None of our victims appeared to know each other or have anything in common...I've done cross check after cross check and I can't find any connection or common thread between any of them." said Detective Tyriq Pile.

" The killer used the same .22 with a silencer on all of the victims, except the first one who was drowned...Nobody in the neighborhood saw or heard anything....They were all dropped off in bad neighborhoods , high crime districts...far away from where they lived.." I added...

'' Our killer likes a rare Puerto Rican rum....I found Shot glasses at two scenes of the crime...I'm having them checked for prints and DNA right now...Not just criminal....I'm running down military, civil service and Interpol." said Detective Carlotta Rodriguez...

''Outstanding Chica." said Sissy...

"I think whoever is doing this is somebody who has a grudge against cops....I had the calls made to each of us traced...and guess what...all of them were made from RIGHT HERE!!! In the Criminal Investigation Division building... I've got other investigators looking at videotape from days ago of everybody coming in and going out of this building at the times the calls were made...I've got telephone secuirty and all of the cell phone providers tracking everything..." said Sissy....

WOW!  What a turn around...

"I'm gonna take some guys and re canvass my victim's scene and find out if I can get a name of who rented out that apartment and how they paid."said Detective Pile.


"Likewise...I got a few guys...Half of em are going to scour the neighborhoods and see if anybody saw anything...see if anybody will talk....and I'm going to see if those video cameras the city pays so much money for picked up anything." said Detective Barlow.


"Good, get to it guys." said Sissy Van Buren...

"Boss lady...I'm waiting on DNA and Fingerprint evidence from those shot glasses...but I got a hunch about that rum...Why don't you tag along?" she said.

''Don't you want to go with uh...ADA Wallace.?"she asked.

"He's driving....but you and me? We are going ...but not like this...We gotta put out some bait where I'm going." she said.

"Huh?" said Sissy.

"Our feminine wiles they call it. Big Bait....Captures Big Rats..." she said and winked at Sissy.


"Okay Chica..."said Sissy.."I got it."she said.

"This ought to be good for a laugh." I said...





III-

 I drove to the Northern Liberties section of Philadelphia... Carlotta lived in this area....We stopped in front of a non-discript little building....

"Keith...you're going to have to wait outside..." she said.

"What...You could be in danger.." I said.

"That's our business ADA... We are cops...but I think your concern is sooo cute." said Carlotta ,pinching my cheek and kissing me softly..

"The man is in love darling.." said Sissy with a smile...

"We can handle ourselves." said Carlotta...

This unassuming little building was a social club...It was owned by and a known meeting place of the Notorious Diaz Brothers... I was no fool...We had been trying to bring this gang of hoodlums down for a long while...I figured...but I never wanted to ask Carlotta if she knew them personally or ever had any dealings with them.

Sissy was certainly not dressed like a cop, She was once again dressed like a sexy woman...The way she had looked in Josies the night before...When she walked in, heads turned and necks snapped ...She sat down at the bar....Then Carlotta came in a few minutes later...

The same thing happened, heads turned, necks snapped and other women got jealous and envious....They sat at the bar and ordered drinks...

Pretty soon, the bartender walked over to them....

"Pretty Carlotta...What brings you back to the neighborhood eh? Slumming?" he said.

" Love you too Carlos...I need to talk to Natividad...Is he around?" she said.

"Yeah..he's around..." he said.

"Could you get him for me...it's important." she said.

"Ha! I'm sure it is.." he sneered.

15 minutes later...Natividad Diaz...Nephew of the late older brother and son of the incarcerated younger Diaz walked into the bar....He was tall, rugged chin, Handsome face and long ponytail.....He walked with a certain swagger and confidence about him.

"You always did keep a girl waiting." laughed Carlotta.

"If you wasn't a cop, I woulda been here a lot sooner." he laughed....Then he smiled and hugged her..

"Damnn, your friend looks good...what is her name?" he said smiling at Sissy..Sissy smiled back and then shyly averted her gaze.

"That's my boss...and this isn't a pleasure visit." she said.

"I figured....I got all my licensces up to snuff..You won't find no violations.." he said suddenly turning serious.

"I don't care about that..This is different." She said.

"I aint snitchin on nobody if that's what you came here for." he said.

"Noooo...I need to find some rum." she said.

He smiled...

"Ohhhhhhhhhhh , rum is it? Well hell, they sell rum all over the city...You come here for rum?" he said.

"This rum can only be found here." she said.

"I don't sell no bootleg rum..All my stuff is legit." he said.


"Natividad...this aint about you baby....This aint about you! When I bust you and one day I will,I won't waste a good party dress...Feel me playboy? Today...I need to know where I can find this type of rum..." she said and she whispered in his ear....He laughed.....

"Ohhhh...you smell great Carlotta...I sure wish you hadn't become a cop...You know, I always liked you...Me and you could have..." he said.

"Woulda ,coulda ,shoulda...but we didn't...Who would sell that kind of rum?" she asked.

"Damnnn baby, youse a bottom line chica....I like that about you!" he said.

"I know...now stop looking at my boobs and answer my question." she said and then laughed. Natividad laughed himself...

"Indian Joe!  He sells it at his bar...Only one of two bars I know of that carries it....Is he in trouble?" asked Natividad Diaz...

"No...I just need to know who purchased this rum from him...It will help me crack a case...that's all..Aint nobody up here in trouble."she said.

He wrote an address on a piece of paper..

"Take that doll...."he said.

"Thank you Natividad." she said.

He looked at Sissy and smiled... Sissy blushed, despite the fact that she didn't want to...


"If either of you ever change your minds...I'm single and available....and I don't mind threesomes." he chuckled..

"Ouuuuuu, you are sooo nasty." laughed Carlotta...

"That's my nickname baby..Nasty Natividad.." he laughed and stuck out his tongue...

"Thank you baby." said Carlotta and she kissed him on the cheek.

"Damn baby....you keep that up and I'll go straight.." he said.

He,Sissy and Carlotta laughed.

Carlotta and Sissy returned to the car...

''Damnnn Chica...Natividad is cute.... He was making my temperature rise a little bit." confessed Sissy.

"He is physically attractive boss lady, but make no mistake...He's a psychopath....eh... a charming one, but still a psychopath just the same." said Carlotta...

"You and him used to be an item?" asked Sissy...

''Nahhh...He could never decide which one of us he wanted...me or my sister, so My dad made his mind up for him....NEITHER!" laughed Carlotta...

''I hear that Chica....Why are the bad ones always sooo fine though?" laughed Sissy...

"I know right?" laughed Carlotta shaking her head.

"Sorry you had to hear all of that Keith...but I do what I have to do to get the job done....You gotta have somebody who will talk to you." she said.

I kissed her in the lips, long and slow...

"I know....and I had to do that....just to let you know that I need ugh, certain jobs done too...Sorry Sissy." I said.

She just laughed....

"Yall about to drive me nuts with all this mush." she said.

Carlotta and I laughed.

IV-

The information Sissy and Carlotta got was more than good...According to Carlotta, this rum was not only rare, but expensive.....Not too many people consumed it... It was $224.00 a bottle..And it was only sold in select places...

We found Indian Joe's bar...The bar had video cameras and after a thorough search we got our first glimpse at who our female with the husky voice was...It was a young white woman with long brownish hair and sunglasses..
She purchased a $224.00 bottle of this rum the day before the first murder was committed...The bartender remembered because it was a cash purchase...and she paid with two hundreds and a twenty and four ones...
A lot of cash in a neighborhood like this.

Detective Tyriq Pile had some interesting things to tell us when we got back...
"Those rooms were rented by several different women...get this.."Nancy Reagon", "Patricia Nixon", "Barbara Bush", "Betty Ford" and "Hillary Clinton"  all paid for with Visa and Mastercard gift cards in their names...We traced the gift cards to various supermarkets, CVS's and Rite Aids were they were purchased...
All with cash." he laughed...

"Looks like our killer has a sense of humor.." laughed Sissy....

"Yeah, but she slipped up....A video camera in the Rite Aid and one in the CVS got a good visual of her." said Tyriq Pyle as he showed us a good photo of the same Long Brown haired White woman that we had..

"Look at this." said Carlotta..

"Oh My god..it's the same woman!!!"said Detective Pile.
Just then Detective Barlow walked into the room...

"I got a make on our mysterious caller." he said.

Sissy,Carlotta and Tyriq looked at him...


"Our cameras caught this woman entering C.I.D. on all of the dates of the murders...We checked every phone though...no finger prints..Whoever she is...she's good.!" he said.

"She look like this?" I asked and I showed him the photo of her buying rum and Detective Pyle's photos of her purchasing Gift cards with cash , cards used to rent and pay for space in all of the apartment complexes..

He showed us his photo...Same woman!!!!


"Okay...so we know she bought the rum...a rare rum found at the scene of two murders...We know that she was inside this building and that she more than likely called all of us...and we know she used phony names to rent and pay for the rooms where we found the bodies...folks...but we can't prove she killed anybody...All we have is circumstantial evidence..We don't even know this woman's name." said Sissy..

That was true...If she hadn't said it....I was going to say it...Glad they knew that they needed more.

Just then, a familiar face appeared...It was Eddie C.

"Hope I'm not disturbing anything.......I am aren't I?" he said...He had a bouquet of roses....and a bottle of champaigne.

"No ,we were just ending our meeting..Most of the other investigators and uniformed policemen began filing out..Detectives Barlow and Detective Pyle were on their phones...

"Sissy...would you join me for dinner...I know I've been missing for awhile, but I can explain...plus...I may need your help." he said.

Sissy looked at me and Carlotta..

"Go handle your business Lieutenant." I said.

"Oh thank you Counselor!" Sissy said sarcastically....Then walked over to me, kissed me on the cheek and said..

"I still love you Keith."  and left with Eddie C.

Carlotta put her arms around me...

"Come on, let's go to my place tonight." she said.

''Okay..." I said.

"I want to show you a trick I learned ...with a banana and oh,I purchased some of that rum.."she said with a sly laugh...

"Girllll, We might not make it to work tomorrow.." I said.

"Ouuu counselor, you're gettin me all hot and bothered." she laughed...

Just then, Carlotta's cell phone vibrated...

"It's probably Sissy." she said.

"Hello." said Carlotta...

"Saturday's Child is Loving and Giving.....You can find the body at the same place...Frostbite Apartments...AHHH ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha...."

"Who are you?" said Carlotta.

"Who was that?" I asked.

"Our poet and rum drinking killer....Sorry Keith, you're going to have to take a rain check on that banana trick and that rum..We got another murder!" said Carlotta..."Tyriq...Jimmy...We got another one!" she yelled.


Now I was mad...We had to get this killer...Whoever she or they were...They were bad for my love life!

(TO BE CONTINUED....)


7 comments:

James Perkins said...

Read both installments this morning...This is great....

Grover Tha Playboy said...

Sissy and Carlotta are just stunning!
All by themselves man!

Swaggie said...

Sissy and Carlotta!!! That's all I gotta say!

Tate 2 said...

Can't believe I'm getting excited over fictional charactors...but dayummmm, Carlotta and Sissy are the truth!

Brenda said...

Settle down guys...They aren't real!
LMBAO!

Cheryl said...

Rum Tum Tummy! That title made me laugh...but it was a great story..Can't wait until tomorrow!

Jazzy said...

"Natividad...this aint about you baby....This aint about you! When I bust you and one day I will,I won't waste a good party dress...Feel me playboy? Great dialouge...She could bust me in that dress she had on ,ANY DAY!