Givin Up The Ghost

I smiled as my car rounded the block where Coral Gables sat. I saw the familiar van, saw the front door of Coral Gables open and knew that my boys had gone to work.. I had a box of two dozen Krispy Kreme Doughnuts and several tumblers of hot coffee for the guys in the Van. Clerow greeted me with his usual toothy grin.

"What's happening boss? Glad you got here with the coffee and doughnuts..we sure could use it right about now?" he said.

Sean Jackson greeted me too..

"Yeah Kev..we got to the bottom of your "haunted house"....I can't believe that you of all people actually fell for this." he said laughing.

"I didn't...but I couldn't explain what was going on." I said. "That's why I called you guys."

"Well Let them explain to you what we found early this morning." said Sean, motioning to Lockpick and Peeping Tom , who were coming out of the front door with a bag full of stuff..

"Hahahahahahaha, somebody really done a number on you guys." laughed Lockpick.

"Okay,I gather that...give it to me straight." I said.

"Long story short Kevin...the doors that opened and closed and locked...was done by these little motorized devices that were attached to them at the bottom.
Too small to be seen in the dark...only visible if you get up close. They're remote control devices....and the naked man chasing the naked woman...These things here, Micro -Holographic projectors...Hidden where a light fixture would normally be...also remote controlled. The screaming and thumps and sounds of footsteps came from these micro sized speakers that I found placed in strategic
positions all over this house...The sound is so good, you think you're actually in the room with someone.... Lockpick and I swept the house..In the basement, we found the Laptop computer that practically orchestrates the entire freak show." said Peeping Tom.

"Wow...so somebody was in the basement running the whole show huh?" I said.

"They didn't have to be...the whole thing could've been controlled by a signal from a cell phone or by someone sitting across the street from the house in a car
with a remote control." said Lockpick.

"That means that someone had to know we were in the house...and upon knowing that, they set this whole thing in motion." I said.

"That's right Kev...and since all your suspects are either asleep or occupied..there was no one to start this little party once we got here. Your suspicions were right." said Sean.

"Gee Thanks guys..." I said. I paid Sean, Lockpick and Peeping Tom and cut them loose...I kept Clerow with me. My friend, FBI Agent Frank Cotton had told me where the phone number had originated from and I needed Clerow with me in case there was any trouble.

The number, was the number Robert and my wife had called...It was the number of one Van Peters, who had been dead for ten years...I had an address and I was going to trace it down. It turned out to be two towns away..A high end shop that specialized in the sale of high end spy and listening equipment.
How ironic! Just the type of equipment used to rig that house. I had to laugh when I thought about it...Of all of the capers I had been involved in..This one was pretty funny.

Clerow and I stopped by and got Robert , who had finnally come up for air and off of the very delectable body of Bonita Turner and had managed to get himself dressed.

"So that was it huh? They rigged the house with gadgets that made us think ghosts were in there huh? Imagine that? I knew there wasn't no ghost in that house." said Robert. Clerow and I looked at each other and chuckled.

The High end shop was open. We walked inside....There were all kinds of electronic gadgetry on display..A huge photo of former Vice President Dick Chaney on the wall, An American Flag and several books on Counter-terrorism,
The CIA, The right to Bare Arms and such.

A Young guy in his early thirties came over to us...

"Can I help you?" He said, looking at us strangely.

"I think you already have" said Robert.

"You recognize him?" I asked.

"Not him...but his voice.....This is the late Van Peters." said Robert Foxworth.

"Oh really? He looks pretty good for a dead guy..What's your secret son?" I said.

"You guys cops?? Look...She paid me...She paid me....She told me to just say I was him and to tell you to come on out...Then I disconected the line ,so that it wouldn't lead you back here...I'm sorry...I had no idea what this was all about..
She bought a lot of stuff and so I figured I'd do her the favor she asked.." he said
excitedly.

"Relax guy...we aren't cops and you aren't in any trouble..We just wanted to know who you were...I've figured out this whole thing now..Take it easy ." I said.

Robert, Clerow and I drove over to the Real Estate office. My Wife Sepia and Bonita Turner were drinking coffee and talking....Upon seeing us..Bonita's eyes got wide.

"Where were you guys? Sight seeing?" she laughed.

"Cut the crap Bonita..I know everything....I know about the rigged house...I know about the High end spy shop and the guy who pretended to be the late Van Peters..I know it all..I know everything except why?" I asked.

Bonita sat down, she drummed her fingers on the desk...She breathed in and breathed out and then said-

"I've been trying to unload that property for two years..Ever since I got my Real Estate license....I couldn't sell it...As soon as people found out that a double murder-suicide occurred there, they backed out...Then those two losers, The Lewises were about to buy it from me...and this clown loses his job and defaults on his loan. My Company was about to take the property from me and give it to your wife and Mr. Foxworth to sell and I just couldn't have that..So I came up with this little plan to scare Him away...Only ,he came back and brought you."
She said.

"I can't believe you would try to play me like that? After last night?? We made love...we said all kinds of things to each other...I drank champaigne out your shoes girl." said Robert Foxworth.

"That was before I met you, before I got to know you baby...I didn't mean to do any of those things Robert..I was going to tell you..please forgive me.." she said.

Sepia hung her head...then she shook it in disgust.

"I guess you're going to call the Police huh Kev?" she said.

"Police? For what? Nobody got hurt. As far as I can see, there is no law against
trying to scare somebody." I said laughing. Clerow was laughing too.

"Uh Kev...Uh..Me and Ms. Turner are going to do a little ,uh talking...My car is
back at the motel...I'll straighten this out...Sepia, don't worry..uh, ah,er..I'll find you a property..I'll be in touch." he said as He and Bonita Turner , got in her car and sped off..

"Can you believe him?" said Sepia as she smiled at me... Clerow and I both cracked up laughing.

We drove back to the motel and packed our things...Clerow sat in the back seat,Sepia on the passenger side. As I was about to get in the car..I could hear sounds coming from the Lewis's room...We had never got to meet them...

"Ouuuuuuuuu...ohhhhhhhh babyyyyyyyy....ohhh my gawddd......lay it on me....ouuuuuu...ohhhhh.."

'Oh Richard..it's sooo good...don't stop...give your baby some more,ouuuuuuu.
I love you...I love you so muchhhhhh...ohhhhhhh.."

"Ohhhh Jayne...Jayne...Jayne...just keep on doin what you're doin..ohhhhh you feel soooo darn goood....ohhhh baby...."

"No wonder they can't make any money...they stay in bed all the time...All they
do is argue and have sex." said Sepia in fake disgust as Clerow, sitting in the backseat laughed uncontrollably...

From Robert's room, there was more sounds...

"Oh Mr. Foxworth...it's soooo good...ohhhhhhh baby, I think I love you..oh give me morrrre..ouuuuuuu...."

"Call me Big daddy baby..."

"Ohhhhh Big Daddy....mama likes..mama likes... give mama some more .....ohhhhhhhhh..."

I shook my head....I got in the car and started it.

"You know...they really need to have thicker walls in this place." I said.

Sepia, Clerow and I burst into gales of laughter as we pulled off and headed back to Philly.


For Nikki, RIP Baby girl!