Ask His Wife

We heard the bed springs squeaking and the sound of a headboard slamming hard against the wall as we stood outside the apartment of Linda Branson...We heard her moaning and yelling out at times-

"OHHHHHH .....OHHHHH MY Goodness...Minister to meeee...OHHHHHHH,
good lord.......ouuuuuuuuuu...."""

Then we heard a distinctive male voice..."Ohhhhhh, give it to meeee, give me morrrrrre...just let daddy have morrrrre..ummmmmph, ohhhh baby."

I was having a case of deja vu...Was I in Chinatown outside of the apartment I thought belonged to Eric Slaughter?

Olivia lit a cigarette and frowned-

"She don't sound like she's so devestated to me. I guess she got over it quick
huh? The poor man aint even in the ground yet and she in there gettin her
freak on."

Cock Robbins smiled and turned his head so that Olivia wouldn't see him laughing..

"Ouuuuuuu papa...give it to me...give it alllll to meeee...ohhhhhhh." came the
voice from the apartment. I hated to ring the bell and interrupt all of this. I really felt bad. This was why I was glad I lived in a house..Nobody could come to my front door and know all of my business like that. These sleazy apartments
had thin walls and everybody in the hallway and on either side of you could hear everything you did from sneeze, make love to sitting on the toilet...There was just no privacy.

"Ohhhh, I think this is it...this is it...here I commmmeeee..ohhhhhhhh." came the distinctly male voice...

"Me tooo....ouuuuuuuuuu...weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.." came the female voice.

At this point Cock Robbins was in hysterics, banging his massive fist against the
wall on the opposite side of the apartment.

I then began ringing the bell.

"Somebody's at the door" said the female voice.

"Oh for Christ's sake, who in the hell could that be"? came the male voice.

I heard some rustling and then we slowly saw the door open... A short, shapely
and voluptuous brown skinned woman came to the door in a very sheer robe that left nothing to the imagination...She was trying hard to hide her breasts
and cover them up, once she saw that at least two men were in the doorway.

Olivia looked at her ,then said to me and Cock-

"I'm going downstairs to the car, I can't be privy to this crap" and she turned and walked towards the elevator.

"Hi...I'm Kevin Morris...I was uh, a friend of your late husband.." I lied.

"Oh...okay, excuse me, I uh had company...come on in.." she said.

Once in, I got a second shock....

"Pastor Struthers????? Is that you??" I asked in horror and disbelief..Now I really had Deja vu...First I had encountered the Pastor of my church with an Asian prostitute in China town..and now here he was in the apartment of this young widow.

"Son, it seems like you're everywhere but church" He said, obviously annoyed that here I was again, seeing him somewhere he shouldn't have been.

"This young woman just suffered a terrible loss and I was here comforting her and offering her a...a...a...a..a..laying on of hands...sometimes a person needs a
human touch.." he said.

By now, Cock Robbins was in the hallway, not even trying to hide his laughter....while I was so mortified that I couldn't speak....Pastor Struthers hastily put on his clothes and kissed Linda Branson on the cheek and said to her-

"I'll see you in church sister Linda...everything is going to be alright...
You too young man...you aint been to church since New Years Eve.."

"Pastor, what about your oil?" she said...

"Keep it here..I may need it the next time I have to annoint you." He laughed.
She giggled too and sighed as he walked out.

It was a nice neat little apartment...There was an overturned wedding photo of her and the now deceased Walt Branson...He was a huge ,six four, 250 pounds,while she was no more than five foot two, 110 pounds if that.

"I'm sorry about that, I didn't know you were coming.." she said.

I could have said the same thing. (I didn't know she was coming either)....but I let it slide...I sat down on her couch and I asked her about Walt....

(To be Continued.....)